Interview with Tanya Ward Goodman and Wesley Stahler, conducted by local REALTOR® Keith Kurlander
Girl Group Enterprises is the brainchild of Wesley Stahler and Tanya Ward Goodman. Wesley is a licensed marriage and family therapist, registered drama therapist and early childhood mental health clinician, who has over fifteen years experience as a child, adolescent and family therapist. She has worked with a wide spectrum of families including female prisoners and their children, new moms, teens with anxiety and OCD and individuals with trauma and or substance abuse histories. She specializes in play therapy, creating rituals and routines to promote healthy coping strategies and self-esteem. Tanya is the author of the memoir, “Leaving Tinkertown.” Her writing has appeared in the Los Angeles Times, Literary Mama, The Huffington Post, Perceptions: A Magazine of the Arts, TheNextFamily.com and in The Cup of Comfort Anthology series. Her writing often focuses on family and caregiving. She has a degree in Performance Studies and Creative Writing from Northwestern University. We’ve been operating Girl Group Enterprises in and around the Los Feliz, Silverlake and Atwater area since 2014.
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We run an ongoing weekly groups for girls ages 7-18, groups for boys ages 7-18. Through writing, conversation, art and movement, we explore a weekly theme and provide concrete tools and strategies to help navigate the journey to adulthood. In addition, we offer short term workshops for parents, adolescents and teens. Starting in June, we’ll offer a Sex Ed series and other guest speakers and workshops. Our calendar changes often, so be sure to check in.
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We were having lunch one day and talking about our girls and the challenges of growing up and wishing we could give them some sort of “guide book.” Wesley wished for a map from her mother that tracked her journey as she traveled from elementary school on. She said, “I wanted to know where Mom was socially, mentally and physically. I wanted to know that my own thoughts, my feelings and my body were normal.” We started thinking about what kind of advice might have served us as girls and about what we had learned throughout our lives. We came to the conclusion that the more we understood ourselves, the more we were able to know what we needed to thrive.
We started Girl Group with just a handful of girls – mostly the daughters of our friends. Before that first group, we met for hours and planned exactly what we wanted to happen. In addition, we mapped out six themed workshops. We wanted each night to include an active practice, some meditation or mindful activity as well as writing, art and conversation. We had worked so hard, that we went into that first ninety-minute session with enough material for a week. We’ve changed the group a bit as we’ve gone along. We are more flexible, letting the girls lead us to what they find interesting. We still focus each session on a theme and try to include action, dialogue, writing and mindfulness, but allow the rhythm of the group to set the pace. At the end of our first six weeks, nearly all the girls signed up for a second series and by the end of that series, we had almost doubled in size. Eventually, our enrollment increased so that we could split the group by age and run two consecutive Friday groups. It’s been a purposeful slow build on our part so that we could see what works and what doesn’t work.
We are continually surprised by the power of word of mouth. Most of our girls have come to Girl Group because they’ve heard about it from a friend or their parents have heard about it from their friends. Every day, we see the results of building a community. It’s also been interesting to come into this as friends and sort of merge into our roles as business partners. Just as we encourage the girls to own their identities, we’ve begun to find and claim ours in the business. For instance, Wesley is a great networker, while Tanya is better at writing press releases, website copy and newsletter updates. We both work on curriculum, but often one of us will come up with a big idea and the other will tie it to a realistic class plan.
We hear from parents that they are seeing a real change in their daughters as a result of their participation in Girl Group. There is a general excitement about the all ages community we are building. The girls are very excited to spend time with each other and we’ve seen a very real camaraderie and caring circle develop over the the sessions. There are many girls who’ve been with us since the inception of Girl Group and they’ve taken more of a leadership role over time. We try to lean into each girl’s strengths while also encouraging them to try new things. We hear more and more that our girls are becoming more confident and more certain about what they need to relax or release stress. It’s all great news!
In almost every group one girl will say, “I never thought of it like that,” or “I feel that way, too.” This connection and exchange is a powerful confidence builder. In a recent group, we talked about “authenticity” and ways of making friends by sharing your true self. An 11-year-old, who appears exquisitely perfect, introduced herself to the group by saying her name followed with "I have a lot of problems.” Almost every other member of the group wiggled their fingers in their air, which our shared sign meaning “I can relate.”
We are introducing Girl Group Summer Camp the week of June 13-17. We’ve got a brand new Boy Group workshop that will preview this summer on June 5, July 24 and July 31 and we’ll start a weekly Boy Group beginning Fall 2016. Upcoming one day and evening workshops for parents and kids include “Combating Boredom” and “Strengthening Your Relationship through Better Communication.” At summer’s end, we will be moving into a new and beautiful permanent space in Atwater Crossing, but will continue to take our workshops on the road. We can tailor our curriculum for local schools, private events, scout groups and more
Los Feliz is a great place to raise kids. With the park so nearby, there is lots of terrific outdoor space to run and play. We often hike the trails near the Observatory and explore the hills around the Old Zoo. The bike path along the river is an ideal weekend adventure. It’s always amazing to see so much wildlife: coyotes, owls, herons, hawks, raccoons and possum. Lately, the kids have been excited to see chatty flocks of wild parakeets. Though we are right in the middle of a huge city, our neighborhood often feels like a small town. We are constantly running into friends and waving to people driving along the street. It’s a great feeling to know so many people and connect in so many different ways.
It feels like every day, there is more to do and see in Los Feliz. We are big fans of the weekday breakfast at Little Dom’s. There is a very peaceful vibe in that back room. Afterwards, we might head up to the Commonwealth trail head to walk off the pancakes. We brainstormed much of our early curriculum while climbing the hills of Griffith Park. The (now dry) fountain at Riverside and Los Feliz Boulevard is surrounded by such a beautiful drought tolerant garden, we almost don’t miss the water. The tiny, cream filled, heart shaped cookies at McCall’s are irresistible as is a scoop at Jeni’s Ice Cream. A dream day might include an hour browsing at Skylight Books followed by a matinee at the Los Feliz 3.
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